Building a Strong Relationship with Your Coach
Coach Mark Hill has left a lasting impression on the Esperanza Basketball Community in more ways than one. The information below is authored by Mark Hill. He gives great insight on how you can be a better student-athlete and develop a stronger player/coach relationship:
Building A Strong Relationship with Your Coach
Do you want to make the most of your season? Do you want to become the best player on your team? Check out this article to see if you are getting the most from your coach. Everything in life comes down to relationships. To be successful in any walk of life, from sports to business, you have to know how to build and maintain productive relationships.
Here are 5 actions you can take to increase your relationship with your coach:
1. Come to the gym prepared to work every day.
One of the hardest things to do is to make the everyday ordinary into extraordinary. Successful people come to each day with a purpose and a drive. They know what they want to accomplish and have a plan to get there. If you want to excel as an athlete you need to do the same. When you have clear goals in mind your coach will take notice through your committed effort every practice and he/she will be much more likely to more proactively engage and help you achieve your goals. If you are wondering what you should set or how to set your goals talk to your coach about what they see and what they would recommend. Ask them what you need to focus on and in what priority order. Working with your coach to create success and growth focused goals and then showing the commitment to those goals will not only earn you great respect with your coach over time but make you more successful in a shorter period of time.
2. Earn your coach's trust and respect by abiding in and supporting their decisions.
Coaches are trained to see the team/you from various different perspectives. Their primary focus is on the overall good of the team, not just an individual’s needs. It is easy in the pressures of competitive sports to get caught up in your own needs. If your perspective is so focused on you that you believe your needs are not being met, frustration may grow that could eventually lead to a breakdown between you and your coach. It is important to remember that, although you may not always agree with the coach’s decisions, they are the coach and you are, no matter how “important” , only one member of the team. Basketball is a TEAM sport and will only be successful if each member works for the best of the team. Giving the coach your full support can help to further your relationship, earning valuable trust and respect not only with your coach but with the other members of the team and the club. With your support, communication will be much easier with your coach and the coach will be able to spend more quality time focused on helping you and the team be successful. Lend your support to the coach and their decisions and you will find the coach lending you their support in turn.
3. Show your coach the same respect you would like to see others give to you.
In the same way you want your parents or the principal of your school or your teachers to show you respect, you need to reciprocate that respect. Respect comes from respect. How do you treat your parents when they are asking you to do something? What if the same request comes from the principal or teacher at your school? Even though we often do not necessarily like every request, sometimes we simply need to comply with it. Are you giving your coach that same respect? Coaches are asked to take their knowledge of the game and pass it on to you. They have for the most part spent many years and even decades learning and experiencing the game, and then passing that knowledge onto you. When learning we often set up expectations of what we will get from doing a task. If the benefit outweighs the cost it is usually something that we do gladly. But when the cost is great and the benefit that we see is minimal, we tend to not put forth as much effort or enthusiasm. It is said that at the elite levels of performance it can be as small as a 0.02% difference between winning and losing. When you are faced with these decisions from your coach, and you will be, try to recognize that you may not only be working on that microscopic change for yourself, but you will be working for the team’s needs as well. Being respectful and willing to help the coach and the team be successful often results in benefits we cannot immediately see, however, you are going to find that the benefits of respect always will be much greater than you see them now.
4. Listen to your coach with more than just your ears.
Learn to “listen” with your eyes, ears, physical patterns (Standing up straight) and your heart. When the coach is speaking at practice or team meetings don’t just focus on the words themselves… Listen to the whole message that is being sent (verbal and nonverbal). You will undoubtedly spend a great deal of time listening to your coach in a group setting. Most coaches I know will begin or end practices with comments or a message for the group. Sometimes this applies to us directly and sometimes they don’t. It comes back to the topic above, respect. When you show the coach respect, even though you may believe that the conversation is not directly addressing you, you are earning respect from the coach (and in “listening” carefully, you may discover that the message has more for you within the team structure than you might have thought). Take the time to truly “listen” to what the coach is saying. Believe it or not, many times the coach may be speaking about someone else in the group but they are sharing the message with your team to help you learn from the situation.
5. When you are experiencing difficulties, such as limited play time, the rapport you have built with your coach will more easily allow you to discuss your concerns and work out solutions.
One of the most common issues with players is: “If I’m not playing as much as I want, how do I get more time”… Although there are always exceptions to the rules, here are some basic principles to keep in mind. 1) Treating the coach with respect and as the authority of the team will provide you with a strong position when it comes to approaching the coach. You will have a much better rapport with the coach and he/she will be more inclined to assist you in your quest. Warning: Coaches will see through the act if you are insincere with your respect. You may not always get your way, and how well you handle those times will really allow your coach to build a respect for you. 2) Most playing time is based on your ability to outperform your teammates in your position… that is simply a reality in competitive sports. You may have to do more than practice to get an advantage. This may require a great deal of time, so get after it early. For example, you may need to be able to jump higher in which case it may take you 3-6 months of training outside of your practices. The key is to work with your coach to find out what you need to do to strengthen your position and then… become an expert at those things. You can never be too physically fit for a sport. 3) How does the team play with you and how do you fit within the team structure? Do you help the team; do you bring energy to the court that your teammates just can’t recreate? Since you play a team sport, you need to become an energy giver. Work hard for your team; let them know you have their backs in sports and as a friend. Never speak negatively about another person on the team and even if you are frustrated don’t play the blame game by saying it is everyone else that is causing your issues. Be positive, lift your teammates, always focus on the positives and live in that world.
As the season begins, you are in the best place to start building a rapport with your coach. Make sure that you take the time to talk with your coach early and often. Create a relationship during the good times so that you will have something to fall back on when you run into difficulties and challenges. Following the five steps above will promote a strong and lasting player-coach relationship for the months ahead.
